oh my sweet corbin

"wanna know why i just ate so much candy and keep eating more? because i want to get sick. want to know why i want to get sick? because i hate school."

"want some gobstoppers? they are sweaty. here, take two."

"today during recess i ran all the way to my house and back before the bell rang. and the teachers and ground dudties didnt even notice. what!!? i was bored!"

"i never sleep. i dont even need sleep. its like i'm remortald or something..."

"sometimes, when a little girl is crying, i run up to her and then punch myself in the face. and then run away like i wasn't even there. it makes them feel better."