my last day

last friday was my last day with my boys. i'll be gone the rest of the summer and when school starts up again they wont need a nanny...so my nanny days with my sweet boys are over. :(

(i walked downstairs on my last day and this was on their little chalkboard)

the last day i was with them, i bought them a bunch of fun summer things to do while i was gone. (the dollar store is a nanny's secret weapon- if anyone was wondering.) i got them floaties, decks of cards, weird goo blow up balloons, weird sponge bug things, water balloons (adding to the 500-yes-500 i already purchased) etc. crap little boys would like. i told them that hopefully it would hold them over for the rest of the summer..... but yes, every single thing was open, used, and pretty much broken by the days end. you wouldnt believvvveeeeee how happy it made them though. cool nanny = dollar store regular. why didnt i know that before now?

(yes, they didnt have little balloons one day so i got regular ones and filled them with the hose. giant mistake.)

-i'll miss the corbin and blake threatening to beat up 'that one old boyfriend' if he makes me cry one more time.
-i'll miss alex running to give me a hug in the morning and clinging onto my leg.
-i'll miss the funny crap corbin says 24/7.
-i'll also miss corbin sincerely telling me from his 9 year old heart that 'you just need to wait, because you'll find the right guy for you soon.'
-i'll miss nick sticking up for alex and asking him if he needs help remembering the three steps for how to 'turn his frown upside down'.
-i'll miss alex  DEMANDING 2 packets of ramen just for himself everday for lunch
-i'll miss nicks donald-duck lisp i tried not to laugh at
-i'll miss blakey talking about his mom and how he knows without a doubt he'll see her again someday.
-i'll miss the funny jokes corbin would tell me all the time that would literally make me laugh way too hard
-i'll miss blakey freaking out unnecessarily over things.


i'll never forget the day i came into the kitchen a few months ago with a tear-stricken face after a certain phonecall. blake and corbin looked at me and didnt know what to say...they just asked if i was okay, what was said to me that made me cry, asking me if they could call back and yell 'shut up' to this certain someone. corbin saw me choking back tears telling them i was fine and this person on the phone was just mean and i was overly sensitive because i was probably tired...and then corbin start crying. i'll never forget watching him sit there at the bar and wipe his tears away with his chubby little hands..just because he saw i was in pain.

i also will never forget the chats me, corb and blake had about their mom who had passed away. i  knew they missed her, but it was so hard to really get through to blakey. one day when we were watching home videos, corbin was pointing out all the old toys they got that christmas from their mom. blake said, "corbin, why are you remembering stuff? everythings gone." broke my heart. later that day i talked with the both of them about her, but blake is a hard one to crack. he always keeps his sadness on the inside and puts on a happy face. i sincerely hope someday he will be able to open up about that to his dad.


when i told my boys to come give me hugs for the last time on friday, i noticed corbin and nick starting to tear up. blake awkwardly watched me cry and didnt know what to say, and alex wouldnt get off of my leg. just look at this little face....................

me: "its okay! i'll come visit and stuff. and i can e-mail blakey and send you guys pictures and stuff, okay? i prrrrrrromise."
alex: "but....but how are we going to keep in touch? (with the most sincere, concerned little face ever) i....i dont even.. i dont even have a facebook!!!!!"

i aaaaaaaaaaalmost lost it when he said that. watching them in the rear-view all waving goodbye to me  from the driveway and watching the little one run after me down the street after my truck....broke. my. heart. they are gonna grow up and get big and i'm not gonna be able to see it all!!!!! :(

yes, saying goodbye to a 7 year old, 9 year old, 10 year old, and 11 year old made me cry- sad, choked-back, painful tears. its a bummer, because i was just getting to know corbin and blakes new step-brothers the past few months...and now i cant be with them. :( ya know what? i think..no..i KNOW..i'm gonna be a hellicopter mom. i'm gonna always wanna be all up in my kids business, so i never miss one single part of them growing up.


i miss my boys already.

sh'boss boys

saw this on a friends blog.

 prepare to have your heart melted.

i'm going to adopt/steal all three of them.

how could you not love him?

Todays quotes from him were some of the best....

corb: NICOLE! Guess what!!!?!?
me: What corbin??
corb:(very matter-of-factly)............I am growing armpit hair.

&

(getting in the ice-cold pool)...
"MY WEENIE IS FROZEN!!!!!!"

 &

"Socks and sandals? Really Blake? Socks and sandals. Gosh. You look like a geek, and I do not want my brother looking like a total geek."

quote of the day

"um nicole, careful when you put that sweatshirt on. theres chicken in the right pocket and grass in the left." - corb

putting my face on...

so, most days/every day i dont get ready. and my boys, corbin and blake, always see me in sweats and glasses looking quite ruffled from a long day at school.

well, once upon a valentines day, i decided to put makup on my face and even curl my hair..which i haven't done in probably months. i walk in as usual, and the convo goes like this:

me: hey how was your day at school?
blake: hi. (turns to look at me. double take.) corbin-look!..wow
corbin: woah
blake: you look........ pretty....(unsure if i was an imposter)
corbin: YOU LOOK LIKE A COMPLETELY DIFFERENT PERSON.
blake: yeah you look really different.
me: ha..maybe i should put my face on more often..(feeling like a complete idiot)
corbin: yeah. you look COMPLETELY DIFFERENT!! you really do!!! its like you're not even you! (notices my sparkly bronzer) your face is even... sparkling. why is it doing that?
me: (i pause and quietly say..)..its because i'm a vampire. vampire's skin sparkles in the sun, didn't you know that?
corbin: .................

im 75% sure he believes me.

and 100% sure its not exactly awesome to be told you look like a completely different person- a pretty person- only with makeup on. epic fail.

time for change..+ kiddies

ok you guys. i need to change my blog name. it has bothered me since uhm, senior year of highschool...but that was the most creative thing i could think of. so, readers, suggest away before i think of something just as lame or lamer- than bloggiebloggieblog.

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in other news: i love kids. wanna know why? they say hilarious things. today i was driving corb to tumbling..and we were rocking out to the lion king soundtrack in the truck..annnd we sort of got into it alot like we do when i put classical music on and we pretend to be some big-shot composer and over dramaticize everything (is that a word?)  Anyways, being you know, crazy and dancing, singing, etc.after a minute corbin stopped, but i was still pretending i was Zazu the responsible, british-bird... and this is what happened.

Corbin finally turned the stereo down...and i kept rockin out. he silently looked at me, and started poking my arm while i was singing. i looked at him...and he gave me the serious eyes..

Corbin: i wish there was a button to turn this down...

(yes. i have been muted by a 9 year old.)

also....when i was at tumbling with him, i was watching with the parents like i always do up in the viewing area, and there is this ADORABLE girl named sarah who is two years old who comes in every week to watch her big brother and sister tumble. (she looks EXACTLY like my sister Jackie did when she was little.)
anyways, this little girl, has the funniest, sassiest vocabulary ever. But, she'll only be my friend when i smile and compliment her, so i did. Mind you, she is TWO!!

Me: Thats pretty lipstick sarah! Is it your moms?
(she inches over to sit by me..)

Sarah: (glopping on sparkly lipgloss) Thank you! Um, its my moms.

Me: Prettttttyyyy!

Sarah: I have my finger nails painted, they are pink. Look at my nails! Do you have your toes painted?

Me: Yeah but you cant see right now cuz i have shoes and socks on.
(sarah takes off her velcro shoes and shoves her little toes by me)

Sarah: Big sarah painted them and they match my fingers, see? they are pink.

Me: Pretty! How old are you again?

Sarah: I'm 2. I'm a big girl. But i was just naughty a minute ago and i didnt get a quarter and my mom spanked me cuz i was bad.
(mom awkwardly laughs and says 'ohhhh she's telling lies..')

Sarah: But I'll listen next time. And guess what, I'm a big girl so I'm pottytrained, except for the other day i pooped and peed in my underwear.

potty-trained at TWO!? i wasn't potty trained till at least 3... and i remember at the age of possibly after 3, I pooped and peed in my underwear cuz i was too busy playing outside to care about proper toilet training. what the heck!?